Unconditionally Loving Yourself

On facebook one day, I saw this quote, “This day, I vow to myself, to treat myself as someone I love truly and deeply – in my thoughts, my actions, the choices I make, the experiences I have, each moment I am conscious, I make the decision to love myself. ” It really took me aback, because I feel like in today’s society everyone is pretending to be confident. Which could just be my perception, but I really want to live my life in a way that exudes unconditional self-love. I said unconditional because when I was younger I used to say things like, “I’ll really love myself when I lose 15 pounds,” or “When I get older I’ll love myself more.” When truthfully, I should love myself right now, because I exist and am deserving of the love I express to others.

So, I decided to share with you all my steps to self-love, and I hope that you can use some of these steps in your journey to self-love.

  • Remove Toxicity. Your space is sacred. Get rid of everyone and everything that threatens your peace. I don’t know about you, but this is extremely difficult for me because I sometimes feel like removing people from my life is an act of anger, but it’s often an act of self-preservation.
  • Find happiness in everyday things. Happiness is often all around us – someone laughing at your joke, the sunset and it’s beautiful colors, making it through the day without complaining – These are all things that could make you happy. Choose to look for the good in the world, and acknowledge the bad – but don’t let it consume you. I like to think that keeping myself happy is a form of love.
  • Relieve stress in positive ways. Stress is a natural part of life and there is no way to avoid it. However, how you deal with  and react to the stress is entirely up to you. Learn to deal with stress in a  positive manner. Such as if you get too overwhelmed with stressed, take 5 minutes to just think about nothing, or work through your anxiety by doing an intense workout routine. Keeping your mind in a healthy state is a part of upkeeping your overall wellbeing healthy.
  • Indulge in Good Karma. Treat others good, not for them to reciprocate, but to make yourself feel good about yourself. Doing something good for someone 9 times out of 10 will make you feel good. Just don’t do too much for another person, where it is creating a burden in your life. Love yourself enough to spread the love to others.

How do you work on loving yourself unconditionally – Share below in the comments!

Keep It Classy,

– T. Renae

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New Semester Preparation CheckList

So today is my last, first day of classes in my undergraduate time at Hampton University. So instead of writing a long post about what I do every semester to prepare for my upcoming semester – I decided to make a quick checklist for you to follow to start your semester!

New semester checklist!

  • GET A PLANNER (Like my cute one from Erin Condren)
  • Put all known dates (like from your school’s academic calendar)  on your calendar.
  • Price text books.
  • Clean out old folders and binders of stuff you won’t need.
  • Input class schedule into phone (and other known events), as well as work out times, meal times, times for homework, etc.
  • Get new cute school supplies.
  • Once you get syllabi, mark down any major assignments into your planner.
  • Create a new assignment sheet based off of your course.

I hope this is a quick tip sheet to help you start off the new semester off on the right foot! For more detail on how I prepare for the semester check out this and this and this !

Keep It Classy,

– T. Renae

Dear Dealing Wit Da Ex,

Hi. So my ex and I broke up, a little over a year ago now. I just recently started talking to someone new, and he’s so awesome and amazing and loving and just great! But now my ex wants to come back. He is blaming me for him cheating.. Like he says if i didn’t call and text all the time, or be around him all the time, he wouldn’t have gotten bored and cheated on me. Like what? My new guy is ready to snap on my ex (which is kinda cute). But I dont want any problems with us to start with, ESPECIALLY if its from my past relationship. How do i handle this without it escalating with my new man getting involved? – Dealing Wit da Ex.

Hey Girl!

First off congrats on the new boo – he sounds like such a winner! Second, your ex sounds like a major jerk. Cheating because your bored is an excuse, if he wanted to be committed to you, he would’ve been – point blank. That’s not shade to you, its shade to him because he couldn’t be man enough to just leave the relationship, instead he took a coward way out and cheated. Tell your new guy not to worry – I would block your ex on social media and if you have an iPhone block him on there too (if you don’t have an iPhone you can go to your phone company and get his number blocked, or change your number completely) because he doesn’t even deserve to see you happy anymore. Cut all ties with him, and focus all your attention on your new boo, and your happiness!

Keep It Classy, 

T.Renae

Love Yourself Challenge: Week 6

Week 6: Self-Reflection

This week is a week of self-reflection. Think about and write out all the ways you could love yourself better. It could be: spending more (or less) on your appearance, doing more things that make you happy, cutting out the dead weight of your life, exercising more, or cutting yourself some slack when you fall a little short of your goals. Make a promise to Yourself to improve on these things this month!

Share Your Experience With Us in the Comments!

– Ladies and Company


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Love Yourself Challenge: Week 5

Week 5: Treat Yourself! Week 5, let’s get live! Treat yourself to something amazing! A long bubble bath, a relaxing day at the beach, a warm and cozy night in your bed with a good book (or Netflix), book a massage, go out to a fancy dinner, a mani/

Week 5, let’s get live! Treat yourself to something amazing! A long bubble bath, a relaxing day at the beach, a warm and cozy night in your bed with a good book (or Netflix), book a massage, go out to a fancy dinner, a mani/pedi or anything that is a treat for you! Just do something to make yourself feel pampered. You deserve it!

Share Your Experience With Us in the Comments!

– Ladies and Company


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Travel Tips!!

So since May 2014, I’ve been on 24 flights, (and will probably be taking four flights more before the summer ends) and about two or three. Traveling sometimes is such a hassle, so here are some tips to make your time traveling much easier!

Pack light and efficiently. Normally when I am traveling, I only travel with a “carry-on” suitcase and a rather large purse. When I bring my laptop, I put it as well as anything I will need immediately (such as the TSA liquids Baggie, Book, Snacks, Etc) in the large purse. Normally TSA makes you take your laptops and liquids out anyways, so it makes it so much easier to just whip it out your purse, instead of digging in the suitcase.

  
In my main suitcase, I have a system. Heaviest items such as shoes go at the very bottom. Normally I put shoes in a plastic Walmart bag because I don’t want the bottom of my dirty shoes touching my beautiful clothes! Speaking of clothes – it has to be strategic! I would suggest light clothes that can be worn in multiple ways depending on where you’re going. If it’s summer time, and you are just going to a weekend trip, dresses are the way to go! I also try to stick to the same color palette so that you don’t have to bring as many accessories because they could go from outfit to outfit every day.

After you have planned out every outfit you need to take then pack the clothes, I roll the outfits together in a way. So I fold the item like half way, then just roll it up and pack it as tightly as I can in the latter half of the suitcase. Then on top of that, I pack underwear, bras, socks, and hair products, anything else I think I’ll need.  I have recently started just having a prepackaged toiletries “grab bag,” equipped with bobby pins, face wash, toothbrush and deodorant, and all the other things I use daily – just in travel size, already ready to go. Zip up the suitcase, and be ready to go! Then if I am carrying my laptop, or need any cords, with my suitcase already zipped and standing upwards, I place the cords and stuff in that mini section after everything has settled in the suitcase.

  
 Dress smart and light on the day of travel! This is so important. It’s okay to be cute, but comfortable, and functional is the way to go! My go-to outfit is a pair of black leggings, cute shirt, and flats, usually with a sweater, or scarf (because planes are cold!). The way you dress will make your TSA security check go either really good or really bad. For easy TSA security check, I suggest the following. Good easy to remove and put back on shoes, such as flip-flops, or flats. I would leave your belts (if you need one) and jewelry in your carry-on “purse.” That way you don’t have to worry about taking them off while in the security check line and save yourself time. Then after you’ve gone through the checkpoint, put all those things back on and be fly!

Arrive early to the airport. You never know if it’ll take you a long time for security. Or how much time boarding will take. It is better to be early for your flight than running to catch it! Early arrival to the airport will give you the opportunity to get snacks if you need it, go to the bathroom prior to getting on the plane, or find your gate in a complicated airport. As the beloved Hampton University saying goes: “To be early is to be on time, to be one time is to be late, and to be late is unacceptable.” I would also try to be as kind as possible to all the staff, TSA agents, and ticket people because they can make or break your entire day!

Bring headphones! I cannot stress it enough. Something about being isolated in your own little musical world. I would also create the playlist. I have a specific playlist if I am sleepy, or trying to stay awake and do work. It may just be me, but I hate with great passion the sound of the plane’s engine. So to prevent me listening to that awful and horrific noise, I bought some BOMB Bose headphones to block out that noise!

Take a bomb travel selfie! My IG is full of bomb travel selfies, I try to make them look very artistic, and sometimes it doesn’t work. However. I suggest taking a selfie with your luggage, to signify that you are in transit, and then a very touristy picture with an amazing background behind you! I have taken to taking pictures of the scenery around me because sometimes there is no one around to take your picture. Also selfies with the scenery is beautiful as well!

    

  

HAVE FUN! Enjoy your time traveling, and make the best of every single moment, because it never lasts as long as it should.

Keep It Classy,

-T. Renae

Renae

Fresh Start Friday: Experience Life

In my humble opinion, One of the greatest things in life to do is experiencing new things. I’m normally really apprehensive about trying new things but once I do finally go out and actually do it I love it! I especially love the rush of trying something new, like flying across the country to California for the first time, alone, last summer was so exhilarating. Life truly exists outside of your comfort zone and it’s a hard lesson to learn, however once you learn it and you keep stepping out of that comfort zone you’ll enjoy it trust me. You never know what types of things you really do like it and that you really don’t like, unless you try them for the first time! My mom always says “Old ways won’t open new doors.” Growing up I always remember her telling me things and go out and explore the world. She always encouraged my brother and I to find what’s out there because she said old ways won’t open new doors. So sometimes it’s good to just go cleanse your mind of everything that you thought was out there, and go out and seek opportunities and experience. Go for a run down the trail you’ve never been down before, or try some tasty new foods. You can even apply this to “experience life” mantra, to things that are not necessarily an expereince, but like a skill. If you’re very math and science type of person maybe go out and take an art class or even try your hand at photography. Life is so full of things we don’t know,  and it’s up to us to go out and find those things that we don’t know exist or that we don’t know we enjoy. We have to go experience them for ourselves. Go to also go experience things for yourself because somebody telling you how beautiful the sunrise looks is completely different than when you actually go and experience the beauty of sunrise yourself.  So this weekend I encourage you to try something go out and experience life at its fullest, in its rawest form. Take some leaps of faith this weekend and go experience life! 

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Keep it Classy,

T.Renae

FRESH START FRIDAYS: NO NEGATIVITY

Sometimes when life starts to get super overwhelming, and negative things start to weigh me down, I wish I could just snap my fingers, spin around three times, and say “Negativity Be Gone,” in my most spellbinding voice and all of those bad things and bad feelings would just disappear. However, that is not how life works, but wouldn’t that be nice. Your life is COMPLETELY in your control, whether you believe it or not. So if there is too much negativity around you GET RID OF IT. Negativity could be honestly anything: bad habits, bad people who complain a lot, your own complaining, too much social media or anything that does not give you good vibes. Biting your nails, drinking soda, whatever you feel is hindering you from being who you want to be GET RID OF IT! Getting rid of all of your negative or bad habits, is not going to happen over night, however if you work on it very diligently, you can do it! I know what you’re thinking, “Tanesha we can’t get rid of all things negative, because do not control how people treat us. What if people treat us negatively?” So what I would say to this is that people only treat them how you allow. This is by far the hardest thing I have EVER had to learn. You may not be directly saying, “hey come be mean to me,” but how you react and behave afterwards does. I have learned through trial and error, if you don’t react to those types of people. Also you could also remember if you just don’t let those things effect you any more, which takes time. “What Sally says of Susie, says more about Sally than Susie.” It takes 21 days to build a habit, so if you do good things for 21 days, you will be able to get rid of all negativity. So if you want to stop complaining, try it for 21 days! Start your new life, Today!

Keep it Classy,
-T.Renae

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3…2…1… Resolution! Part 1

Resolution (res•o•lu•tion) noun; a firm decision to do or not to do something.

The easiest way to define a resolution is strangely to define what it is not.

A Resolution Absolutely Is Not:

-A dare

Take yourself seriously or no one will. While you do want to pick a challenge, don’t set yourself up for the disappointment with something you KNOW you’re not going to do.

-A competition between you friends or pesky siblings.

If your super perfect older sister declares that she’s going to start working out every day don’t make that your resolution as well just to top her. Unless you two are going to encourage each other to keep up the goal and not nag each other about NOT doing what it is that neither of you was planning on anyways. Be mindful not to attempt to one up another person with your resolution.

– The Resolution is not a display for others

Don’t make a resolution to show off or belittle another person. Your resolutions are also not for anyone else’s scrutiny. Your resolution may seem too big, too small, too silly or too serious for some people. So be sure to share with those who will really encourage you, not discourage or talk you out of it.

Now, all Resolutions are not created equal. Through my experience I have met with three main types of resolutions that I have organized in what I think is easy to advanced levels.

-Starting Today Resolution (Easy)

The most basic of the resolutions. Starting on January 1 of whatever year, challenge yourself to take on a certain attitude or pick up a new positive habit and CONTINUE with it throughout the year! This is a beginner’s resolution, one of the easiest to conquer and a good, positive place to start.

-Never Will I Ever Resolution (intermediate)

This is a personal challenge resolution. During this year, with this resolution you will work very hard on your self-control. Set daily reminders to avoid, delete and erase that certain something (or someone) out of your life. The perfect resolution for the strong-minded, may not work so well on those easily swayed by temptation.

The End Result Resolution (advanced)

On December 31 of 201_ (fill in the blank) where do you hope to see yourself? What do you hope to claim, possess, lose? This is a resolution with a deadline, but the pro to this type of resolution is that you can start whenever you please. Perfect for those who work well under pressure and prefer project deadlines. Warning: might not work well for chronic procrastinators!

– Aliah